I've noticed that random ass titles like that get the most views and comments.  Ya'll got some serious ADD.

Yesterday I almost got hit by a car.  Seriously.  The front bumper of a souped up Acura and my legs got real close.  Super tight.  Like we went back to the 1st grade or something.  I was crossing my street (because, hello, accidents only happen super close to your house.   This is the universe's way of embarrassing the shit out of you.) while I had the light when the Batmobile wanna-be whipped around trying to make a left turn.  I stood there and gave the driver my fiercest I am a pedestrian you must yield to me (!) look.  And then, AND THEN, this douchebag lurches forward and stops short as if to threaten me!  So I did what any conscious person would do; I banged on the driver's side window and gave him the finger while shouting all sorts of flowery explicatives. 

I mean really?  Hit me.  Do it, I dare you.  I will feign so many injuries you'll have to take out a second mortgage to pay me off.  Back pain, neck pain, emotional distress.  Also, my fetus.  I could've been pregnant.  I'm not, (::knocks feverishly on wood::) but I could've been!

In totally unrelated news, earlier today I was being nosy and browsing other people's monitors at work when I saw one of my co-workers looking at the NAACP website.  ...Cool but, he was white.  o_O  Is it racist that I'm giving him the side eye for that?  I mean, what could he possibly be looking for?  Verifying how much he's not oppressed?  Searching for scholarships he can't apply to?  I am just very curious.  I like to know where everyone's head is... at.  I hate ending sentences with a preposition.  But I'll lose my street cred if I don't.  Feel me?

In closing, I bought new shoes a few weeks ago.  #Kapow.  How badass am I, though?  Feel free to discuss in the comments.




Love you moreee,

Tee